Saturday, February 28, 2009

Rule #1

Humans wear clothing.

For most people this is a no brainer. We wake up in the morning, look in our closet, take a couple seconds to consider the weather and the events of the day and then get dressed.

The Police Officer finds his pile of clothes and attempts to independently get dressed each morning. There may be some complaining about how a particular item is too tricky to put on or items that end up backwards or on the wrong foot, but all in all a pretty low key event.

Crash on the other hand is very threatened by clothing and would prefer to run around the house naked (even when it is 30 below zero). When strictly applying Rule #1 all hell can break loose and screaming tantrums occur. This simple rule now turns into:
Rule #1: No bumpy clothes.
Rule #2: No tags on clothes
Rule #3: No jeans.
Rule #4: No khakis.
Rule #5: No sweaters.
Rule #6: No new clothes.
Rule #7: No clothing that has been washed too many times.
Rule #8: No seams in unusual places.
Rule #9: No squishy items.
Rule #10: No scary items (at any given point any item may be deemed scary)

Well what does that leave;
sweat pants, long sleeve soft tagless t-shirt, and seamless socks

However even when presented with items that follow all of the "rules" getting dressed can still be quite a production.

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